Today I was at the kitchen sink washing dishes. Rowan was crawling around (still can't believe I'm saying that) entertaining himself. A few minutes passed, and then I felt his little hands hold onto my legs so tight. I looked down at him and cooed and said and did the things that make him laugh, and he did for a few minutes. Once he realized I wasn't picking him up yet he began to do his "pick me up" cry, and it got a little louder the more that I continued to finish up the dishes. It was in that moment that I couldn't stop smiling and thought, "Oh my gosh! I'm a MOM. I'm a mmmmmoooommm!!" With his little fingers clenching tighter on my legs and his little cry getting more persistent, I just melted.
I'm a mother. My dreams have come true!
I just never want to forget that moment.
I have a crawler!
He keeps one leg tucked under, but he manages to make it from
room to room already.
We may have a few chants around here to keep him motivated..
"Go Rowan GO! Go Rowan GO!" & other regulars
to which he stops, looks at me and smiles, then keeps going.
That's my Ro boy.
Today I am feeling incredibly grateful. For my wonderful little family. For all that I have. I guess I'm having one of those days where everything hits you, in a good way. I read Stephanie Nielson's book," Heaven Is Here", a few months ago, and I can honestly say that it has had a permanent impact on me. A rejuvenating I-want-to-be-the-best-mother-wife-daughter-friend-sister-ect. impact on me. The part that spoke to me the most was her view of and ways of mothering. If she offered a class, I would take it. The book is just as good as a class though, really. I think of it almost daily. It's definitely a read that makes you feel thankful for your life, not just because of what the author has had to go through and is continuing to go through, but because she is such a great example of being thankful herself.
On a different but somewhat the same note, Rowan is wonderful as always. Not every moment is wonderful of course, this is real life, but he is wonderful despite the hard moments. He is having his morning nap and I still can't believe how much I miss him when he is sleeping. Spencer and I were laughing about that last night. How he gets super fussy right before it's time to put him down and when he falls asleep we're so relieved, but then an hour later we can't stop talking about how cute he is and all the little things he does, and how we miss him!
My baby is HUGE! Whyyyyyyy? Why is it going by so fast!? Whenever the thought crosses my mind that he won't always have those chunky-squeezy thighs and kissable cheeks, fingers that hold onto me so tight, huge open-mouthed smiles that brighten the whole room just for me, well..I can't handle it!!!! It's like he is too good to be true, only he is true! Six months ago I loved this baby boy of mine, so much, but not nearly as much as I do today. Is that okay to say? It's true though. We had a wonderful start, then it got pretty rough there for awhile. I feel bad that everyone around me could see it. Ah. A bit of a rough recovery for me & collicky months for my sweet baby...not very fun. I will do much better next time. I'm so glad to know now that the dark days do end. They do, and when they do, it's all so worth it!!! That large family I've always wanted? Yeah, still gonna happen.
While I was cleaning the refrigerator yesterday, I had this charming little man to entertain me, and vise versa. Seriously, that face! That smile! Those eyes, teeth, nose, chin, chubs, hair....YUMMMM!! Obviously this is some motherly love talking, but still....
He makes me so happy! I love that my days are sprinkled with making each other laugh and smile over and over, among all of the normal daily tasks. Along with that comes the hard moments of course. The poop-everywhere moments. I never understood it when people talked about poop getting everywhere or poop being such a big deal. Yeah, everybody poops..haven't you heard? The first time I really got it though was when I was giving Ro boy his third bath in two hours, washing his crib sheet, onsie, and my own shirt, wiping down multiple surfaces, and spraying febreez throughout the house. THATS when I got it. HA! I still don't understand how it manages to get everywhere, I just know that it DOES. I have to say though, Rowan laughing at me while I'm cleaning it all up is the best comic-relief. Anyway, my point is that even with those moments here and there, they are fleeting. We don't focus on them and by bed time, all I can remember from the day are the happy moments. I'm glad that we're designed that way, to mostly remember the good in things. I think we are that way naturally if we don't fight it.
Also, I found a copy cat recipe of Pita Jungle's Chicken Del Sol (which I LOVE) so I tried it out for dinner last night and it turned out preeeeeetty dang great. I'm not very good at baking, but cooking I seem to have a lot more luck in and I love to do it.
At the end of the day Spencer came home from work happy, which makes me happy. He sure is a champion.